A New Beginning
by Meg Nik
Summary: It has been three years since the arrival of Karson to the Shepherd brood. The family embarks on a new adventure, but what happens when it ends in tragedy? Read more to find out.
1. Highway to Hell

Highway to Hell

 **A/N: It has been a few years since I've written a story. Yesterday I was thinking, why not start another one. So bear with me if this absolutely sucks! I also do not own any of the Grey's Anatomy characters, except for my original characters, aka the kids.**

It was the first day of summer for the Grey-Shepherd brood. Meredith was running around the kitchen cleaning up the mess her family had left from breakfast. Derek was taking luggage to the car. This was the year they were taking the kids to Disneyland.

"Meredith screamed up the stairs at the kids, "Kinsley, Kennedy, Kollin. Help your dad load the car. Karson, can you help me clean the kitchen?" She heard stomping and running coming down the stairs./p

Sixteen-year-old Kinsley Shepherd was talking on the phone to her best friend, Abigail. "I know I'm going to miss it. I'll be back before the summer is over. Make sure nothing good happens without me." Looking up as she hangs up the phone, she asks Meredith, "Do I have to go? I'm going to miss way too much the next few weeks. Can't I just stay home?"

"No, you can't. Don't you want to see your mom? She's going to meet us for a few days while we are in California." Meredith says, glancing in Kinsley's direction

"I guess." Kinsley says, stomping off to help her dad finish loading the car.

Eleven-year-old Kennedy comes in, hugging her mom. "I cannot wait to get to Disneyland. I want to meet Elsa and Anna. I want to sit in the sun with Olaf. How long is it going to take us to get there?" Kennedy is hopping from foot to foot, anxious for an answer.

"It's going to take 18 whole hours. That means you would need to watch 36 episodes of "Stuck in the Middle" to get there." Meredith chuckles at her rambunctious daughter.

"OK, let's go!" Kennedy yells as she ran out to the car with her iPad ready for viewing TV shows.

Kollin and Karson come racing down the stairs. Eight-year-old Kollin grabs a juice box off of the counter. "Is it time to go yet?"

"Not yet. Almost though." Meredith says as she reaches down to pick up three-year-old Karson. "Are you ready to go see Mickey Mouse, Karson?"

"Yes!" Karson yells, kicking until Meredith sits him back down.

"Boys, why don't you both go on outside to the car. I'm almost finished here. Then, we are Disneyland bound!" Meredith wipes up the last of the crumbs off the counter.

Two hours later.

"Are we there yet?" Kollin screams from the backseat.

"No, sweetheart. We haven't even left Washington yet." Derek calls back as he maneuvers I-5 traffic. It was raining extremely hard as well. The rain had slowed their travels. Instead being two hours away from Seattle, they had only made it an hour away so far.

"How much longer?" Kollin whines.

"A very long time, Kollin." Meredith sighs.

Traffic was coming to a standstill up ahead. Derek slows the car to a stop. "Maybe we should have flown." Derek puts his head in his hands.

"No, this is quality family time." Meredith jokes. "And you know how I feel about airplanes." They had been involved in a plane crash 2 years earlier. They were lucky to make it out alive. Lexie and Mark did not. The kids were crushed that they lost their aunt and uncle, but were grateful to still have their parents.

The visibility on the highway is terrible. Derek turns around and looks at his children. Seeing that Karson has dropped his sippy cup, Derek throws the car in park since they are stuck in traffic and unbuckles to reach the cup. Just as he sits back up to hand the cup back to Karson, he sees a semi-truck barreling towards them. Meredith looks over at Derek, "Why do you have a look of terror on your face? We're going to the happiest place on Earth."/

Derek looks at his kids, "I love you, guys." Looking over at Meredith, as he turns around to try to buckle back up before impact, he says, "I love you so much, Meredith. Whatever happens, know I will always love you."

"What are you talking about?" Meredith looks at her husband.

The truck driver did not see the stopped traffic in time. Although he was braking, there was no way he was going to be able to stop in time.

Derek buckles his seat belt just as the truck makes an impact.

 _Where am I?_ Meredith opens her eyes. Realizing what had happened, she looks around the wreckage, making sure her family was still in one piece. Karson is still in his car seat, crying, not sure what is going on. Kollin and Kennedy are still in their booster seats with shocked expressions on their faces. Kinsley is slumped forward with her head against Kollin's seat. The luggage had been tossed towards the front of their SUV. The SUV was a total loss from what Meredith could see. She looks over at Derek, gasping as she sees his condition. His head is through the windshield, resting on the hood of the car. Her vision starts getting fuzzy. She realizes then that her family is in trouble as she falls into unconsciousness.

 **A/N: I know, I know. Not cool to start a story off like this. But I wanted to catch ya'lls attention early. R/R. Let me know what you think! More to come soon, especially because I'm on Spring Break from my school job.**


	2. Save Me

Save Me

 **A/N: I do not own any of Shonda Rhimes' amazing characters. I only own the kids which I created like 4 years ago (crazy! I know). Thanks to Patsy for reviewing the first chapter. It made me want to continue on today! I've also been watching a lot of ER lately, so there is a cameo of some familiar ER faces in this chapter. I do not own them either.**

 _Previously in A New Beginning_

 _Where am I? Meredith opens her eyes. Realizing what had happened, she looks around the wreckage, making sure her family was still in one piece. Karson is still in his car seat, crying, not sure what is going on. Kollin and Kennedy are still in their booster seats with shocked expressions on their faces. Kinsley is slumped forward with her head against Kollin's seat. The luggage had been tossed towards the front of their SUV. The SUV was a total loss from what Meredith could see. She looks over at Derek, gasping as she sees his condition. His head is through the windshield, resting on the hood of the car. Her vision starts getting fuzzy. She realizes then that her family is in trouble as she falls into unconsciousness._

"Sixteen-year-old female involved in a MVA. Unconscious at the scene. Became conscious when we loaded her on the chopper." Flight Nurses unloaded the backboard onto a gurney on the helicopter pad at Grey-Sloan Memorial.

"Where's my dad? What happened? Where's Meredith?" Kinsley screamed over the helicopter.

Hearing Meredith's name, Miranda Bailey finally looked over at the patient. Seeing a bloody Kinsley, Bailey tries to keep her composure. "Kinsley, what happened? You should be in California right now."

Kinsley, thankful for a familiar face, screaming, "Dad looked at us and said he loved us. And then I don't remember what happened after that."/

Bailey turns to the flight nurse, "Where are the other victims? I know for a fact there were 5 others in the car with her. Her parents work here."

"Three were taken to Seattle Children's Hospital in Olympia with minor injuries. There are two more helicopters coming your way with more victims." The flight nurse jumped back in the helicopter.

Olympia, Washington

"Where's my mom and dad? Where's Kinsley?" Kennedy looks around a very busy ER. Kollin and Karson are on gurneys next to her.

Kollin looks at his sister, "I don't see them anywhere. Where did they go?" Karson had fallen asleep on his gurney, but not before he let the hospital staff know he was not happy to be there.

A doctor walks over to them. "Hey kiddos. I'm Dr. Ross. You are all going to be okay. I don't know much about your parents, but I'm sure they are at another hospital wondering if you are okay. Do you know your parents' phone number?"

Kennedy looks at the doctor, with tears in her eyes. "555-6789 is my mom's number."

"Okay. We will give that number a try. Hang tight kiddos." Dr. Doug Ross walks over to the desk. Seeing his wife, the charge nurse, he hands her a number. "Hey, Carol. Can you call this number for me and see if you can get this mom on the phone? Her kids came here from the wreck on I-5 and they're fine, just shaken up."

Carol looks up from her notepad. "Sure thing."

Back at Grey-Sloan Memorial, the staff are hard at work on Derek, Meredith, and Kinsley. They are the three worst injured in the accident.

As Richard Webber and Maggie Pierce work on Meredith, a phone starts ringing. Maggie realizes that it's Meredith's phone in her pocket. "Meredith, I'm going to get your phone for you and answer it, okay?"

"Okay," Meredith groans.

"Meredith Grey's phone. Dr. Pierce speaking," Maggie answers the phone.

"Hi, I'm Carol Ross, a nurse at Seattle Children's Hospital in Olympia. Is Meredith available to speak right now?"

"She's currently heading for a head CT. I'm actually her half sister. Is this about my niece and nephews?" Maggie answers.

"It is. I wanted to let her know that they are fine. We just need someone here to sign paperwork to discharge them and pick them up," Carol replies.

"OK. Either myself or their Aunt Amelia will be that way as soon as possible. We're both doctors, so as soon as this trauma situation clears up, one of us will head that way. Thank you so much." Maggie, sighs with relief

Maggie headed down to CT where Derek was in progress in the scanner. Amelia Shepherd frowned at the computer screen. "This isn't good. This isn't good at all."

"What is it?" Maggie glances over Amelia's shoulder.

"He has a hematoma on the frontal lobe. I'm going to have to watch this closely." Amelia looks in at her brother. "I can't lose another man in my life right now."

"Hang in there, okay. He's going to be fine. Seattle Children's just called about Kennedy, Kollin, and Karson. They said they were fine, but someone needs to go pick them up. You stay and take care of Meredith, Derek, and Kinsley. I'll go get them." Maggie gets up and heads out to her car.

 _Three Hours Later_

Maggie sat with Kennedy, Kollin, and Karson in the waiting room of Grey-Sloan Memorial. "When can we see mom and dad?" Kennedy says, as she lays her head on her aunt's shoulder.

"Your mom should be out of surgery soon. She hurt her head in the crash so she may have a headache when you get to see her. She also broke her arm. That's why she had surgery. Callie is fixing her arm. Your dad hurt his head really bad. He's still sleeping. He also hurt his ribs." Maggie hugs her niece tightly.

"What about Kinsley? Where is she at?" Kollin says as he distracts Karson with a toy.

"Kinsley broke her back, but don't worry Callie and Aunt Amelia has fixed her up. She's going to have to work hard to get better, but Kinsley will do it. Her head might be hurting as well because she hit the back of your seat, Kollin." Maggie says as she tickles her nephews. "Everything is going to be alright. I promise."

 **A/N: So at first I was going to kill Derek off...but since we need some happy, at this moment no one is going to die...we'll see where it goes from here. :) R/R. Let me know what you think. And for those closet ER fans that read this, how did you like the cameo of Doug and Carol?**


	3. Author's Note 5232016

Author's Note:

I am so sorry that an update hasn't happened yet. I've been really busy with my job at the University due to a huge three day teacher workshop that we are having the second week of June. I've also been trying to find a teaching job. But I will definitely be writing again too. If you have a Facebook, check out my Facebook page megnikfanfic for updates on when I'm writing. Thank you for bearing with me.

Meg Nik


	4. Stand By Me

Stand By Me

 **A/N: I do not own any of Shonda Rhine amazing characters. Sorry for the delay. Since I'm stuck in a doctor's office this beautiful day, I decided to write while I was waiting to be seen.**

 _It has been three days since the accident. Kinsley has been under sedation. Derek is recovering from a traumatic brain injury. Meredith is about to be discharged. Kennedy, Kollin, and Karson are all okay._

Kinsley jolts awake, trying to sit up. Dr. Callie Torres jumps up, putting a hand gently on Kinsley's shoulder. "Sweetie, don't try to sit up. You're in a brace for your back to heal. You broke your back in the accident, but you'll be good as new by the time school starts."

Kinsley looks at Callie, "What do you mean when school starts? I have to be like this all summer?" Kinsley starts tearing up.

Callie pats Kinsley's shoulder. "It'll be okay, I promise. If you work hard it could be sooner."

"Where's my dad?" Kinsley whimpers.

"He had some head trauma that your Aunt Amelia is watching. He's in good hands. Meredith is getting discharged today and your sister and brothers are at home with your Aunt Maggie. You are all fine. You are all going to be just fine," Callie says, as she looks away so Kinsley doesn't see her tear up. This was reminding her of when she was thrown through a windshield. Derek went through the exact same trauma. _He just has to pull through._

 _Meanwhile, in Meredith's room:_

"Everything is checking out. Your arm looks like it's healing well, your ribs are also healing nicely, and other than a concussion, you're clear of head trauma. If you're ready we will discharge you today. Just let Maggie and Amelia help you at home." Bailey looks up at Meredith while swiping through her chart.

"I'm ready. I need to see Derek. And make sure Kinsley is okay. Has anyone called Addison? She needs to be here." Meredith is anxious, ready to get to her husband and step-daughter.

"Calm down, Meredith. I called Addison. As soon as she makes sure the clinic has her cases covered, she'll be on her way," Richard pats Meredith's leg. Addison works at the Oceanside Wellness Clinic in Los Angeles as an OB/GYN.

Amelia crosses the room and joins the other two doctors by Meredith's bedside. "Derek isn't bleeding in his frontal lobe anymore. I managed to stop it in surgery the day of the accident. He isn't worsening. He isn't improving. It is just a waiting game. He still has brain activity and is responding to only painful stimuli. But I know my brother. He will pull through this. He just has to." Amelia turns away, fighting back tears.

Bailey adds, "He had some blunt chest trauma as well. We are monitoring that closely, but his chest tube output has slowed tremendously. He also had a CT and MRI of his chest earlier and other than the collapsed lung, he seems to have been spared of anything major."

Meredith slowly gets up and reaches for her sister-in-law, pulling her into a gentle hug. "Thank you. And yes, Derek is strong. He will pull through this."

"Callie comes in to find this scene and holds back tears herself. "Is Derek okay?"

"He's doing okay. There's really no change other than all the bleeding has stopped. It's just a waiting game now," Bailey says. "How about you give Meredith an update on Kinsley."

"Yes. That's actually what I came here for. We just let up on sedation and let her wake up. She has a fracture dislocation of the spine. We surgically fixed her. She will be in a back brace for up to three months and then I will reevaluate her then. She still has some swelling and a drain at both sites. I had to go in from the front and the back of the spine. She doesn't have feeling from the hips down at the moment, but with the spinal fusion I did, I'm hopeful that it will improve. She's in good spirits."

"Thanks for looking after her, Callie. I don't know what I would have done without you." Meredith walks over and gives her a gentle hug as well.

After Meredith is discharged, she races up, well as fast as someone who was just in a MVA can, to Derek's room. She slowly walks in. Derek is off the vent now and breathing on his own. His head is bandaged and he has cuts and bruises all over his face and arms. Meredith sees he still has a chest tube, but it looks like it isn't draining anything anymore, just as Bailey had said earlier. Meredith walks up to his bedside and pulls up a chair. Grabbing Derek's hand, she says, "I'm here, Derek. Hang in there. We've got you."

Next thing Meredith knows, she's being tapped awake. "Mer. Wake up, Mer. We need to do a follow up CT on Derek. I just want to monitor him closely so no surprises arise."

Meredith glances up to see Amelia's worried face. "Yea, sure. I'll go check on Kinsley. I need to call Maggie too and see how Kennedy, Kollin, and Karson are doing."

While Meredith is making her way to the Pediatric Ward, which she is sure Kinsley is hating right now, due to all the "tiny humans" around her, she reaches in her pocket for her phone. Dialing Maggie's number, she puts the phone to her ear.

"Hello, Meredith. Are you okay?"

"I'm fine. They discharged me a few hours ago. I just can't bring myself to leave until Derek is for sure okay. How are the kids?" Meredith realizes she hasn't seen them since before the accident.

"They're fine. We just finished dinner. They are eating popsicles and watching emFrozen/em in the living room. They have been asking about you, Derek, and Kinsley. I told them that you were all okay, but just needed a little more help from the doctors than they did."

"Okay. Thank you for playing interference. If you need to get back to work tomorrow, bring them to the hospital. I think I can handle them here. I know they're probably scared. Tell them that mommy loves them."

"I took the week off. Dr. Riggs is covering my service. If you want though, we can come have lunch with you tomorrow."

"That would be great. Thank you so much Maggie. I'm going to check on Kinsley now, since they just took Derek to CT. Tell the kids I will see them tomorrow, okay?"

"Will do, Mer. Just let me know if anything changes okay?"

"Okay."

Meredith puts her phone back in her pocket as she enters Kinsley's room. She discovers Kinsley laying in the bed, with her best friend Abigail sitting in the chair next to them. Of course they were watching _Keeping Up With the Kardashians._ For some reason, Meredith had no clue why, but Kinsley was obsessed with them. "Hey girls. Looks like you've got good company, Kinsley."

"Hey, Meredith." Kinsley grins at her step-mother. "Abigail came to keep me company until her curfew. Especially since you and dad were kinda tied up. Mom should be here tomorrow. She had to tie up loose ends at work."

"I'm glad you came, Abigail. It helped me and her dad out a lot." Meredith smiles at the giggling girls. She was glad Kinsley had a friend her age that could distract her from the problem at hand.

"It was no problem, Dr. Grey." Abigail handed Kinsley a water.

"I wanted to give you an update on your dad. He's still the same. No better. No worse. It's just a waiting game. But your Aunt Amelia is watching him closely," Meredith says as she gently sits on the bed.

"How are you doing, Meredith?" Kinsley looks at her arm with concern.

"I'll be okay. It's just a broken arm. Callie fixed it up. And your sister and brothers are fine. They are at home with Maggie. They're going to come for lunch tomorrow, so if you want we can come and eat in here with you since you can't get to the cafeteria quite yet." Meredith smiles at her step-daughter.

"That sounds good. I actually kind of miss those munchkins," Kinsley giggles.

"Good. I'm going to let you two continue your marathon TV watching. I'll let you know if anything changes with your dad, okay? Meredith starts to get up and head to the door.

"Okay. And Meredith, I love you." Kinsley looks at Meredith with gratitude.

"I love you, too, Kinsley." Meredith gets out of the room just in time to let the tears roll. That was the first time since Kinsley was in elementary school that she told her that. Even though she knew Derek wouldn't be awake, she wanted to get back to his room and tell him.

Meredith comes back into his room and sits back in the chair next to his bed. She was sure Amelia would be back by shortly to give her an update. Meredith grabs Derek's hand and says, "You will never guess what Kinsley just said to me. She told me she loved me. She hasn't said that in ages." Meredith leans down and gives him a kiss on the cheek.

As she starts to lean up, Derek's eyes start to blink. "I love you, too. You're a great mom."

She sits up quickly, and looks into her husband's eyes. "Derek?"

"Yes, Mer?"

 **A/N: Sorry to leave you to another cliff hanger. It took me all day even after the doctor's office to get this story done. And I have an ear infection, just lovely since I work 8 hours tomorrow. Hope everyone has a safe and Happy Memorial Day if you are in the States. The next 2 weeks are crazy so I may not update for three weeks, but I promise it's coming. Thanks for all the reviews. It's the fans like you that keep me writing. Also don't forget about my Facebook fan page if you want to keep up with when I am writing! megnikfanfic**


	5. That's Me Trying

That's Me Trying

 **A/N: I apologize so much for not writing for a year! Yikes! That first year of teaching kicked my tail, but I survived and learned a lot. So now that it is summer and I have less responsibility (not much less, but still less) I am going to try to update either every week or every other week. And since I hit a road block with my story line…This is going to jump ahead a little bit… I do not own any of the wonderful characters from Shonda Rhimes mind…but I own the kiddos :) Enjoy!**

 _Previously on "A New Beginning"_

 _Meredith comes back into his room and sits back in the chair next to his bed. She was sure Amelia would be back by shortly to give her an update. Meredith grabs Derek's hand and says, "You will never guess what Kinsley just said to me. She told me she loved me. She hasn't said that in ages." Meredith leans down and gives him a kiss on the cheek._

 _As she starts to lean up, Derek's eyes start to blink. "I love you, too. You're a great mom."_

 _She sits up quickly, and looks into her husband's eyes. "Derek?"_

 _"Yes, Mer?"_

Two weeks has passed since the horrific crash. Derek is at an inpatient rehabilitation facility. Kinsley has been discharged and has home health coming and doing rehabilitation at home. Meredith is trying to work and juggle the other kids.

Thankfully, Addison is staying and helping out with Kinsley and the kids as much as she can, with Kinsley's half-brother, three-year-old Henry in tow. She is remarried to Kinsley's step-father, Jake Reilly, who has an adult daughter named Angela.

"Kids! I'm leaving for work! Please be good for Addison!" Meredith screams up the stairs as she is gathering her things for work.

"Meredith….they're children… how hard can they be? They can't be as bad as Kinsley was when she was little." Addison smirks at Meredith as she fixes the kids cereal for breakfast.

"Good luck is all I'm going to say." Meredith walks out the door, chuckling.

Kennedy comes clomping down the stairs. "What's for breakfast, Addison? Do you need me to take Kinsley something to eat?"

"We are having cereal. Will you take this bowl to her please?" Addison hands Kennedy a bowl carefully.

"Sure." Kennedy walks carefully but quickly to the living room where Kinsley is lounging watching TV.

Before Addison knew it, chaos was ensuing. The three boys - Kollin, Karson, and Henry - were running through the kitchen towards the table, but in the process, knock over the jug of milk. Sighing, Addison grabs a towel out of the drawer. As she kneels down to clean it up, she yells up at the eight-year-old and 2 three-year-olds. "Guys, you need to slow down. You just made this mess. Now we have to find something else for breakfast."

"I'm sorry, Addison. We were just excited to see what you had made for us. Mom always makes pancakes… but since the accident, she hasn't had time." Kollin starts to head to the spill to help.

"You know what. We'll do just that. Let's make some pancakes. But first, I need to go buy some more milk. Girls! I'm running to the store. I'm going to take Karson and Henry with me. How do pancakes sound?"

"Awesome!" Kennedy exclaims.

"Better than this crappy cereal," Kinsley complains.

"Okay." Addison runs out the door with the preschoolers.

One hour later, a frazzled Addison comes dragging in the door. Henry and Karson are bouncing off the walls. Kennedy meets her at the door. "What are wrong with those two crazies?"

"The bakery gave them each 2 cookies and now they are bouncing off the walls." Addison sighed. She couldn't imagine having 5 kids. She did not see how she was going to survive the day. emWhat have I gotten myself into?

 _Meanwhile at the rehab…_

Derek is walking down the hallway doing his daily laps. It's his last week in the rehab center. He sits down by the dining room to wait on Meredith. They have been doing lunch together every day since he arrived at the rehab facility. But of course with her chaotic schedule, he never knew when she would show up. Sighing, he picks up his cell phone and decides to call Addison and check on the kids.

"Hello?" Kinsley answers the phone.

"Hey sweetheart. It's dad. How is everyone doing? Where's your mom?"

"Well, I'm fine. Mom is currently struggling to get Karson and Henry to take a nap. They are currently winning," Kinsley chuckles into the phone.

"I bet that is a fun sight to watch, huh?"

"Yes, it is. It's the most entertainment I've had this entire summer."

Meredith walks up and sits down next to Derek.

"Ok, sweetheart. Don't let them drive your mom too nuts. Meredith is here to eat lunch. I will see you on Friday. I love you!"

"I love you, too, Dad."

Hanging up the phone, Derek leans over and kisses Meredith on the forehead. "Our kids are giving my ex-wife a run for her money."

"Just lovely. Addison is going to go running back to Los Angeles as soon as you get home… watch." Meredith frowns, looking at her lap.

"Well by then, Kinsley should be walking better. I'll be home too. I doubt Amelia will clear me for work for a few more weeks. Once we get Kinsley going again, everything will be back to normal. I promise."

"Are you sure?" Meredith looks at him with doubt in her eyes.

"Yes. We're going to be okay, Mer? Aren't we always?"

"Yes. Yes we are."

 _Later that night…_

Meredith walks in from a long day at the hospital. She had performed 3 surgeries back to back. Exhausted, she plops down in the living room chair. As she does, she sees Kinsley asleep on the couch with earbuds in her ears. She had come a long way. She is walking with assistance with a walker now and is determined to at least be on the sidelines for cheerleading that fall. Meredith gets up and walks over, kissing her on the forehead. She whispers in her ear, "I am so proud of you! I love you!"

Kinsley mumbles, "Love you too, Mer…" and drifts back off to sleep.

She decides to go check on how her kitchen fared in that day's chaos. To her surprise, it is spic and span. Addison was actually asleep at the bar countertop, with her head on the counter. Not wanting to wake her, she walks upstairs to check on the other four kids.

Peeking in Kennedy's room, she finds her fast asleep, cuddling her pillow. Checking on the boys was a comical sight. Kollin is asleep as normal, however, Henry and Karson were asleep upside down off of Karson's bed. Gently moving them, Meredith places them in bed correctly.

At the end of the week, her family would all be under the same roof again, and she couldn't wait.

 **A/N: Thanks for being patient with me over this past year. I PROMISE this will not happen again. Where do you want this story to go? I'm running low on ideas, so I'm open to all and any suggestions. Also don't forget may Facebook page megnikfanfic to keep up with when I'm writing or on hiatus. Love you guys :)**


	6. This Is How We Do It

This is How We Do It

 **A/N: I know, I know 2 updates in the past two weeks… I will say don't get use to it. I'm trying to pay off some debt this summer, so I'm about to be working 7 days a week until my next vacation trip. Joys of adulthood. Thank you for all the encouraging reviews. I know I have become the author I swore I never would be…which would be not updating like I should. But as you all know life gets in the way. But anyways, I do not own Shonda's wonderful characters. I do however own the kiddos. :)**

The day has finally arrived. Derek is heading home for the first time in weeks. Meredith helped him plan a surprise trip, a Disney cruise for the family, this time including Addison and her new family as well as a thank you for going nuts helping out. As they pull up to the house the kids are outside in the yard holding signs and waving balloons, saying "Welcome home, Dad!"

Getting out of the car, Derek only has a cane to use for support and reassurance now. As he walks up the driveway slowly, Kinsley, Kennedy, Kollin, and Karson run towards their dad - well, Kinsley walked with her walker. "I've missed you, daddy!" Kennedy gently hugs her dad's torso.

"I've missed you more," Derek says, holding back tears of joy. "Listen, we need to go inside. I've got something for everyone.

"A few minutes later, Meredith corrals the kids in the living room. Addison stands behind the couch looking in on her ex-husband's happy family. "What is it, dad?" Kinsley bounces with anticipation. Even at sixteen, she gets excited for surprises.

"Well, when the accident happened, we were heading to Disneyland, right?" Derek grins at the kids.

"Yes. That was scary." Kollin shrugs his shoulders at his dad.

"Well, your mom and I wanted to make it up to all of you, even you Addison, for this summer not going as planned. So we are going to fly to San Diego for a Disney cruise to Vancouver the week before school starts. By then Kinsley will be walking on her own again and we can have a blast. What do you think?"

Karson screams, "Mickey!"

Giggling, Meredith walks over, scoops up the 3 year old and says, "Yes, you will get to see Mickey."

 _A few weeks later…_

A few weeks has passed. Kinsley has been walking on her own for about a week now. Derek is back at work. The family is getting back to normal. Addison feels like she is no longer needed. She has decided to head back to Los Angeles.

"Do you really have to go, mom? It seems like you just got here," Kinsley whines to her mother. "I haven't gotten to spend much time with Henry. Please stay for another week. Please?"

"Sweetheart, you know I've got to get back to work. I will see you in a few weeks on our trip. I've got patients that I need to go help. Henry also needs to get back on a schedule. And I miss Jake. He's been too busy with work and keeping the clinic going to come up and see us here." Addison hugs her daughter. "You know if I could stay I would."

"I know. I just wish you could stay. But I understand." Kinsley thinks back to the past. She misses the days that she had in preschool, living in sunny Los Angeles. She still struggles with why her mom brought her to dull, rainy Seattle and left her at her dad's eleven years prior. "Mom, why did you leave me here all those years ago? Did you not want me?"

"You know I wanted you. I had a lot going on. I had things I needed to handle before I could sufficiently take care of you. So I decided that your dad would be better for you than me. I did it because I love you." Addison has tears forming in her eyes. She knew this day would come, but she didn't expect it to be this soon.

Kinsley lowers her head into her hands. Crying, she looks back up at her mom. "I don't know what to say to that. I get that you love me and you did it because of that, but why did I not know dad until then either."

At a loss of words, Addison looks at her daughter. "I don't have an answer to that question. I knew he had a lot going on and I had just moved to Los Angeles when I found out I was pregnant with you. He was having trouble with Meredith and I knew that would probably cause them to never get back together. I know it's not an excuse, but I did things because at the time I thought it was the only way. I'm so sorry, Kinsley."

Kinsley gets up and walks upstairs to her room. She doesn't know what to say to her mom. She is in disbelief at her reasons.

 _Meanwhile in the kitchen…_

"Why did you even say that, Addison? What were you thinking?" Derek is furious with his ex wife.

"She asked, Derek. What did you want me to do? Lie?" Addison shot back.

"I don't know. Now looking back, why didn't you tell me about Kinsley from the beginning?" Derek glares at Addison.

"I….I don't know. I had just moved to Los Angeles. You and Meredith were on the rocks. I didn't know what to do. I thought about abortion, but then I thought back to when I did that with Mark and the abortion then, and I couldn't bring myself to do it. I knew that if I brought it up then, you and Meredith wouldn't have survived." Addison looks at her ex husband, her first love, with concern.

"That makes sense I guess, but you still shouldn't have kept it from me. It isn't fair to me, but it definitely isn't fair to Kinsley. I missed her first word, her first tooth, when she crawled, her first steps. There are so many firsts that I missed." Derek looks down at the kitchen counter.

"I missed a lot of firsts as well. I missed her first day of school. I missed her first dance. I missed her learning to drive. I know that is my fault. I should have stayed involved, but I didn't want to confuse her." Addison grabs her bag and starts out of the kitchen to go get Henry so they could leave. "I'm really sorry, Derek. I am. If you don't want me to go to on the cruise with you all now, I understand. Just let me know. I've got a flight to catch." Addison walks out the door.

 **A/N: I didn't want to go this route this early in the story…but I was running out of plot ideas. So any other ideas anyone may have, leave them in the reviews. Thank you for being loyal fans of this trilogy. :) I love getting reviews!**


	7. If Tomorrow Never Comes

**A/N: Sorry it's been almost 3 months. My life got super crazy! I was working 60 hour weeks and my sister had a baby, which is no excuse. But since Hurricane Irma is currently hitting my house and my school I teach at is closed for 2 days, I figured I would write a chapter. I will admit I have been stuck since the last chapter on how to proceed. Lucky for ya'll I pull inspiration from my own life, and since I had a pretty emotional, depressing weekend, I'm using those feelings to write! :) Enjoy! and read and review :) Also if you are or were in the path of Irma, I'm praying for your safety.**

If Tomorrow Never Comes

 _I cannot believe she abandoned me like that._ Kinsley sits on her bed picking at a thread on her bedspread. _Why didn't she want me? What could have been more important in her life than me?_

Kinsley gets up and walks to her mirror. She has always been told she looks like her mother. She has the same red hair and blue-green eyes her mother has. Secretly, she hates this about herself. Every time she looks in a mirror she is reminded of her mother.

 _Why couldn't I get my dad's looks? I've always been the odd one out. Kennedy, Kollin, and Karson look like siblings. I've always been the "step-child._ Kinsley walks toward her door and sticks her head against the door. She could hear her parents fighting from the kitchen. _All they do is fight when it's about me. I wonder what would have happened if I never existed._

She walks over to her dresser. Picking up a bottle of prescription pain meds from the accident, she rolls the bottle between her hands. She walks back to her bed, sitting, looking at the bottle of water on her nightstand. _This could end it all. This could just remove the problem, me, from this situation. This could fix my mom and dad's problems forever._

She reaches for the bottle of water, unscrewing the cap and sitting it back down on her nightstand. Looking at the bottle, she reads the label - _hydrocodone. All it would take is 9…_

She opens the bottle and pours the twenty remaining pills into her hand. She puts them in her mouth and reaches for her water bottle. Taking a few swigs of the water, she swallows the pills. Sitting there on her bed, she leans back and lays against her pillows. _The problem is solved. I will be out of their hair soon._

Ten minutes later, she realizes what she did was stupid. She reaches for her cell phone to call 911 instead of bothering her stupid, fighting parents. Dialing the number, she waits until the operator answers.

"911. What's your emergency?"

"I've overdosed on…." Before Kinsley could get the sentence out, the world turns black.

"Ma'am? Are you still there? What did you overdose on?" After a pause.. "I have help on the way."

_ Five minutes later, Derek is sitting at the kitchen island with his head in his hands. Meredith turns from the stove where she is cooking dinner. Addison and Henry just left to head back to Los Angeles.

"Are you okay?" Meredith looks at her husband worried.

"I guess. I just can't believe Addison. Why open this can of worms years later? Kinsley's only sixteen. We should have been discussing this with a counselor not in our living room." Derek shakes his head standing up.

Before Meredith can respond, they hear the doorbell ring. Getting up and heading towards the living room, they find Kennedy at an open door with police and paramedics standing there.

"Can I help you?" Meredith asks as she steps towards Kennedy.

"Yes, ma'am. We received a phone call from this residence about an overdose." A paramedic is looking around the house.

"I'm not sure who would have called. Kennedy, have you and your brothers been playing with the phone again?" Derek looks sternly at his teenage daughter.

"No. We've been right here playing video games." Kennedy looks bewildered at her father.

Derek turns from his daughter and back to the paramedics. "I do have another daughter upstairs. Let me go check and see if she's prank calling."

Derek heads up the stairs to Kinsley's room. As he opens the door, he calls out, "Kinsley, I know you're mad, but seriously prank calling the first responders…" Derek gasps and screams down the stairs as he sees his daughter unresponsive with an empty prescription bottle next to her. "Up here! My daughter is unresponsive!"

The paramedics rush up the stairs as Meredith directs Kennedy, Kollin, and Karson into the kitchen.

"Mom, what's wrong?" Kennedy asks. "Why did they run up there when dad called them?"

Meredith puts her hands on Kennedy's shoulders, since she's almost as tall as her mom now. "Sweetheart, I know just as much as you do." She pulls Kennedy into a hug. Thankfully the boys are distracted with the alphabet letters on the refrigerator.

Arizona Robbins and Alex Karev stand outside the ER. They are waiting on a pediatric overdose case. "It's crazy how kids can get into drugs today. I wonder why this child did it." Alex glances down to see his shoe untied. He squats down to tie it.

"Alex, we can't think like that. We don't know this kid's situation. She could be in a bad home and thought this was her only way out. You of all people should know that." Arizona shakes her head at Alex.

Alex stands up when they see the ambulance approaching. They run towards it as it stops and the doors swing open. They stand there in shock when the doors open.

Derek looks out at his two friends. "It's Kinsley. It's Kinsley. I don't know why she would do this!"

 **A/N: Sorry to leave you in a cliffhanger! But hopefully I will have time to write again soon! Read and review and let me know what you think!**


	8. How to Save a Life

**A/N: Thanks Patsy for reviewing! I figured why not try to write another one before going back to school on Wednesday! I'm safe at the moment from Irma as well. I live 90 miles west of Atlanta. So here's your answer to the cliffhanger! Enjoy! Because after this it may be Thanksgiving before I can update! Also like my Facebook page at** **megnikfanfic**

 **How to Save a Life**

It has been two days since Derek found Kinsley unresponsive. They are in a waiting game. Amelia has been staying right at her niece's side waiting for a sign that she will be okay.

Addison came back to Seattle as soon as she landed in Los Angeles, this time leaving Henry with his dad.

"How could you let this happen?" Addison screams at Derek as she enters the PICU waiting room.

"Me? How I could let this happen? This isn't just my fault!" Derek shouts back.

"Addison, Derek. This really isn't the place to discuss this," Meredith steps between them. "I know I have no say in this matter as her stepmother, but I do have a say when it affects those three children that you just woke up over there. Pull it together and go elsewhere to discuss it if you cannot do it at a "G" rating."

"Meredith's right, Addison. We don't know why she did this. We're in a waiting game to find out why, if we ever find out. Just sit down and wait. That's all we can do," Derek says as he gets up, and picks up his sleepy youngest child. Cradling Karson, Derek sits back down to rock his child back to sleep.

"Fine." Addison chooses a seat far away from her ex-husband and his new family.

—

Right before the next visiting hours for the PICU, Amelia Shepherd, Arizona Robbins, and Alex Karev pulls Addison and Derek in the family room to discuss the latest updates on Kinsley's condition.

"So, as you know, we don't know how many hydrocodone Kinsley took. We treated her the best we could based on the information we received upon her arrival," Arizona says, looking sadly towards her friends.

"Right now, nothing has changed. Neurologically she's still showing activity on the EEG. So it's still a waiting game, but if she's anything like her dad, she'll get through this," Amelia utters as she wipes a tear from her eyes.

"She's on dialysis to continue pulling the toxins out of her body, so she will hopefully regain consciousness soon. We're also watching her liver enzymes to watch for liver failure. Right now we do believe she is in liver failure, but it's too soon to know. We're hoping all of the symptoms can be reversed with treatment," Alex adds.

"So we're still just waiting. After two days….really?" Addison asks with disbelief on her face.

"Yes, Addison. We just have to wait and hope for the best," Amelia exclaims, getting up and walking out.

—-

Meanwhile in the waiting room…

"Mom, is Kinsley going to be okay?" Kennedy asks, as she colors a get well soon card for her sister. Kennedy has become the crafty diva of the house.

"I don't know, sweetheart, I don't know." Meredith looks at three of her four "chatty children" as Cristina would call them. Cristina and Owen had split up years ago. Cristina then moved to Europe to take over Preston Burke's hospital. They sent emails and occasionally called, but their friendship would never be the same. Owen actually ended up marrying Amelia, so Meredith's kids knew him as Uncle Owen.

Karson and Kollin start fighting over a red car that they both love to play with. _Ugh. I should have bought two of those when we bought it._ "Boys, we have to share. Do you think that you could share for me this one time?"

The boys look up at their mother, "No." They both scream "Mine!" at the same time.

"Okay, if you can't share, the car is mine." Meredith gets up crossing the room to her sons. She reaches down and takes the car. _The last thing I need is for the boys to start fighting._ "What about this? I'm going to check with Aunt Maggie and see if she'll take you to the park for a little bit. How does that sound?"

"Yay! I want to go to park," Karson grins up at his mom.

"That would be a nice change," Kollin exclaims.

"Can I just stay here with you mom?" Kennedy asks.

"Yes, you can." Kennedy has grown up so much since the car wreck. She helps more around the house, even helping Kollin with his homework and Karson with any potty mishaps he may have.

Derek walks out of the family room and comes over to his wife and teenage daughter. "There's no change. Why don't you and the kids go and get some lunch? I'll stay back and sit with Kinsley for a while."

"Are you sure? I was going to get Maggie to take the boys to the park. Kennedy wanted to stay with us and I told her she could." Meredith looks at Derek concerned.

"Yes. Go get food. You can bring me a sandwich back." Derek pats his wife's shoulder.

"Okay kiddos, let's go find food. Then we'll see if Aunt Maggie is up for a park trip." Meredith picks up the cars the boys were playing with and motions for the kids to follow her.

Derek heads into the PICU and walks to his daughter's room. Pulling a chair up close to her bed, he lowers himself into it. Holding her hand, he lays his head on her bed. _Please be okay. Please let me fix this. Whatever caused you to do this, let me be able to fix it for you._

After twenty minutes, Derek drifts to sleep. Even though visiting hours were over, no one has the heart to wake him to tell him that. After an hour, something jolts Derek awake. His daughter's hand is wiggling under his head.

"Daddy?"

 **A/N: I know, I know… another cliffhanger. Not cool I know. But hey, two chapters in one day is a record for me! :) Please read and review.. If I get all my grading and such done for my students tomorrow, I may have time to write another chapter.. stay tuned! And follow my Facebook page megnikfanfic for updates on when I'm writing.**


	9. I Lived

**A/N: Sorry it's been so long since I updated. Life has been a rollercoaster this school year. Now that it is finally winding down…let's see what I can type out :) lol**

 **By the Grace of God**

 _ **Previously in A New Beginning….**_

 _Derek heads into the PICU and walks to his daughter's room. Pulling a chair up close to her bed, he lowers himself into it. Holding her hand, he lays his head on her bed. Please be okay. Please let me fix this. Whatever caused you to do this, let me be able to fix it for you._

 _After twenty minutes, Derek drifts to sleep. Even though visiting hours were over, no one has the heart to wake him to tell him that. After an hour, something jolts Derek awake. His daughter's hand is wiggling under his head._

" _Daddy?"_

—

"Kinsley?" Derek jolts up in his chair.

"I'm sorry, Daddy!" Kinsley cries, blinking back tears. "I'm sorry for everything."

"Baby, it's okay. It isn't your fault." Derek pats his eldest daughter's head.

"It is my fault. It's my fault you and mom are fighting. I figured that if I wasn't around, you wouldn't have to talk anymore. And if you didn't have to talk anymore, you couldn't fight." Kinsley turns her head away from her dad.

"Sweetheart. I hate to break it to you, but your mother and I have been fighting long before we even had you. I can promise you that."

"But if I wasn't around, you wouldn't be arguing. If I had never been born, you wouldn't still have to talk to her." Kinsley rolls to her side, putting her back to her father, as well as she could with all the wires still attached to her.

"Don't talk like that. Your mother and I love you. We would never want to imagine the world without your smiling face." Derek leans down and kisses his daughter's forehead. "I'm going to go find your Aunt Amelia and let her check you over. Then I'm going to go find your mom, Meredith, and the kids and let them know that you're okay. You scared your brothers and sister half to death." Derek gets up and walks out of the room in search of his sister.

Derek finds his sister with the entire brood in the cafeteria. "Hey Amelia." Derek motions for his sister to come over to where he is. He didn't want to let the family bombard Kinsley just yet.

Amelia gets up and walks over to her brother. "What's wrong? Is Kinsley okay?"

"She just woke up. I believe she's okay. Do you want to come and check her out?"

"Yea, come on." Amelia follows Derek out of the cafeteria.

—

A few weeks have passed since Kinsley woke up in the hospital. Derek and Addison now attends family therapy with her weekly. Summer is coming to a close. The entire Grey-Shepherd brood are getting ready for a new school year. Life is looking up for all of the family. Kinsley realizes that what she did was the stupidest thing she could have done. Suicide doesn't solve anything. It just hurts the people you love and leave behind.

The End.

 **A/N: Thank you to everyone who stuck by this trilogy the past few years. This is where I draw it to a clsoe. I know this is a sucky ending for my writing standards, but I have been struggling with this chapter for 6 months and feel like my attention has been pulled away from writing by work and just life in general. I am tinkering with writing a fan fiction about April since I am sad she's leaving the show. She's the one I identify with the most. But please review. Thank you for reading the Dark and Twisty Life trilogy. Love ya'll**


End file.
